it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
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