Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
