just come out here and I will go home with you...
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
