Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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