Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Randomize
