Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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