So drunk, too bad you don't want this
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
