omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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