I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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