Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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