Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize