Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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