none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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