what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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