Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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