The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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