I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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