I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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