She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
