i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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