She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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