He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Sorry my hands just texted you
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize