please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
