He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
