I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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