I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
