fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize