Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
