Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
