every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
