The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
