somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize