maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
