We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
