evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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