he shaved USA in his pubs
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
