too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Farmville is her only friend.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
