I don't think brook has ever known best
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
