I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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