I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize