butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Everclear isn't food dammit
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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