Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
