Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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