My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
honey bunches of taint.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
