This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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