Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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