so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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