I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
