my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
