Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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