It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
so much tequila, so little girl.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
