Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
